Yesterday should have been a difficult day for me. Thank goodness a friend save me from all the drama and made me accept things gradually. I did shed some tears in the elevator but surprisingly it soon dried up.
I guess for some reason, deep down my subconscious mind I'm ready for this.
First day of March, around 3pm, I went inside the pantry cause I'm about to go home. My head approached me and told me about what was discussed in recent board meeting. He mentioned about the decision of the board to get new machines for the dialysis, the bad news is, they will not promote VNs to trainees.
I wasn't devastated by the fact that I won't get promoted. Rather I was saddened by his intention to make me decide about my future in the hospital, whether to stay or leave.. He informed me that my batch mates are about to be promoted and I'm gonna be left out. I got no issue with that but some people think that it would be unfair for me if I won't get promoted too.
This reminded me of my real intention of getting inside the hospital. I thought this would be my chance to fulfill what I really came there for. To learn as much as I can so it wouldn't be difficult for me to cope when I got out of the country. Although I still can't stop myself to get emotional when I think of the fact that I will leave people who I already got used to see everyday.
This reminded me of my real intention of getting inside the hospital. I thought this would be my chance to fulfill what I really came there for. To learn as much as I can so it wouldn't be difficult for me to cope when I got out of the country. Although I still can't stop myself to get emotional when I think of the fact that I will leave people who I already got used to see everyday.
Dialysis unit is a great workplace. It isn't perfect but it is a happy place. However, these past few days my life has been hard. I thought of quitting and all morbid stuffs. I cried, prayed and asked God for his guidance. Now, He answered.
A while ago, I was asked to go to the chief nurse office. Like expected our chief nurse wants the good for me. She pulled the trigger of the gun I'm holding. She decided what's suppose to be the best to do for me and that is to get into the nursing services. To think of it, I've been subconsciously wanting to be rotated ever since my friends got out from the dialysis unit. Now, I guess I got my wish granted in the right time.
Honestly, everything is going on a slow motion for me right now. Things aren't sinking and I haven't contemplated my position and what is ahead of me. I guess my mind choose not to worry, I'll reserve it on March 11.
See u guys in the floor!
