I think the problem with me is whenever I get close with the opposite sex. I assume there would be some intimate connection that will happen. I guess that is the consequence of my NBSB status. I keep telling myself that I don’t need a guy in my life. Now, I’m surrounded with guys and I honestly, I’m not comfortable.
I got this one co-worker at the hospital. He has a girlfriend and he looks fine. I seldom got the chance to work with him in the same shift. But just recently I got pulled down because one of their team mates got ill. But if my instincts serve me right, I already felt something about him. I can tell it through his eyes and gestures. Our first encounter was the IV insertion incident. It was my first time to insert intravenously and he assisted me in the isolation room. Result: we massacred the patient and blood was all over the place. Moments with him was not repeated until recently.
Whether forecast: he’s a flirt. He’s being linked with two of our not so bad nurse attendant. In fact, I was also rumored but I cleared it out already.
Just yesterday we had a chance to bond out and enjoy ourselves in a private pool. It was fun, generally. For the preparation, since it’s my day off. I took over and bought all the necessary materials needed for the party. He’s with me along with another nurse attendant. We went to his house and ask for his contribution. I paid respect for his dad. There’s familiarity in the place and his dad looks familiar too. Later, he told that according to his dad I look familiar also. Ending, we found out that we were classmates in first grade.
We’ve used his motorbike to shop. I was at the end portion of the bike. He parked the motor and Gelo and I went to the wet market to buy what we need. Then, we proceeded to the supermarket to buy some more. He found us there. Although he’s a flirt it’s hard to tell whether he likes me or not. There’s a block in his eyes that hinders me to see what he thinks. He didn’t even say a word about me, my outfit. But just like what they say, action speaks louder.
We finished buying stuffs in no time. It’s time to go home. We dropped all our merchandise at Gelo’s house. We stayed for a couple of while then head back home. We were just two in his bike. I noticed something, he drives slower. I remember the first time I endorsed to him. He said, “Can we take it slowly”, I refused. I hold gently unto his shoulder. My legs are touching his pelvis. I can feel that he’s sweating, close to profuse. I wanted to ask him why, but I think it would just create an awkward moment. We got into the front of the hospital; I withdrew my hand over his shoulder. Romel have seen us and called our attention, we stopped. I think this guy got also lured into my trap, but I need more cues. We talked for a while then said goodbye. Since the hospital is close to our house. I just walked and didn’t ride anymore.
It’s time, Ode was supposed to pick me up at 5 but she was late again so I picked her up. We arrived at the rendezvous late but earlier than the others. It’s 6 and weren’t complete yet. An unknown number texted me, asking where are we and he’s coming. I replied and ask who the sender is. Surprise, it’s him. Earlier, I texted him and asked him to bring some rice but he never replied. Thoughts: of all the people why me? Yeah, it sounds shallow but little things mean something.
He already arrived. We were almost complete. There was neither a word nor contact at the first quarter of the party. The fun started at the middle after we got all tipsy. He went over, touched my elbow and got near my ear. He asked me about the sandwiches I prepared. I got hold of the loaf and hand it to him. Ode and the others got some too. They are complaining about the taste but I heard him say, “pinaghirapan ni jane yan eh”. I heard it clear but I pretended I didn’t hear a thing but on one hand my heart went to 100 bpm.
Honestly, I got drunk,,,fast. I know what I’m doing but I left out shy somewhere. I took over the mike and sang “I will survive”. In an instant, he’s on my side and doing something I couldn’t tell. I finished the song looking stupid. He hold my hand and told me he’s gonna tell me something but in a snap, Gelo and him already carried me into the pool. Good thing, they jumped with me. I was the first person who was carried down the pool. And I thought that was the last but it wasn’t.
I tried the slide, yes I’m not good at swimming but I can handle myself. But after I splashed on the water, I found myself in his arms. Thoughts: Huh? What? When? Where? How? Even how confused I ‘am, I pretended not to care and told him to get me there. Honestly, I was really lost. I started to think and analyze his gestures since then.
Third encounter, he pulled me out of the water again and carried me in his shoulder and jumped in the water. Thoughts: Duh, it’s my second already. Then it happened again for the 3rd time. Gosh,too much contact. Thoughts: Is he looking for ways to touch me?
I went to the other side of the pool with Jam. We had a chat time. After a few moments, he’s already there, also chatting with us,putting his back on my side of the body. Thoughts: off all the group of people why on us? After a while he’s getting ready to carry me again, the newly wed style. I refused. So there was some struggling that happened. But expectedly, I can’t overpower him so he took me to the other side of the pool. I hurriedly went to Ode as soon as I can touch the floor.
I was telling a story then, when he pulled me again to take to the other side of the pool. But he failed because I acted out and he loose grip of me. Now I realized, what if he was able to take me to the other side of the pool. It was only the two of us there. It must have been fun.
In general, I played heart to get. Just the way I played the game with the other playboy I targeted before. I think that’s the best way it should be played. I won’t loose anything if I won’t let my self fall. I’m used to being alone anyways.
