Every time you get close, I try hold back and push you away. I’m scared you’ll get fond of me and people will misinterpret. The worst, you’ll eventually develop feelings for me and things will turn into horror.
As an older sister, I want you to be happy but I’m not suppose to be the one who will provide that. I want to see you walking on the right direction with people who can direct you well. I want to hear good things from other people and just feel proud about your accomplishments. I wanna be someone who will be behind your back, going unnoticed. Hope you’ll do good.
Your presence burns me and it hurts but at the same time it excites me and I know I shouldn’t feel that way. How can I stop myself from hurting? It hurts when you’re away and it also hurts when you’re close. I wanna stop this misery? How can I end it.
I swear it feels like I’m bleeding inside when you had your new pet and she performs well, better than I do. I guess you want to remind me of something. I feel wrong to think negatively about her but I guess I’m just a jealous bitch after all.
There, I said it! I suck on dealing with these kind of feelings. Not to mention my hormones are definitely running wild right now. I hate the way I feel ,seriously.
This is the main reason why I hate feeling so happy because of you. WHY? Cause definitely you will make the next day horrible.
