It’s been 2 days without my HD buddies and I’m still getting by. It’s feels really different without them. I don’t know why but for some reason I feel like I’m hanging on a thread…again. Like any moment, the thread will either break or I’ll let my hand slip from it. This is just the same feeling I had during my first few weeks at the unit— UNCERTAINTY.
The replacement VNs we had are ok but I’m still longing for the old crazy and funny buddies I had. I realized it’s natural to feel this way and I hate that I had to go through it. I wonder whether my laguna buddies felt the same way when I left them.
Another insult to the injury is my mentor who acts like a jerk, messing up with me every single duty. I feel his intention, shoving it to my face that I did wrong when I got too attached with the old volunteers. It’s not really my fault cause we were just compatible and everything followed.
Not all people will understand how a relationship form and works in spite of all the external and internal factors surrounding them. But, I guess that’s the magic that lies within.
My mind right now is not as clear as before. I think a lot and I consider possibilities and opportunities. It’s not the same when you had those people who understands you. I know parting is part of life and I thought I’m well prepared. Too bad it sunk late and I reacted on delay.
As of now, I’m trying to put things on order by making myself busy and preoccupying my mind with important matters. Though at times I can’t stop myself from thinking about those people who taught me a lot of things, made me a good person, showed the part of me who I don’t know, and made me realize that life is not contained in a box.
I’m gonna keep you in my heart forever: Tin, Lei and Barce.
