This morning, while I was in the middle of a dream that I couldn't remember, I hear someone calling out my name outside. I went out as soon as I sense the urgency even before I clean my face from any traces of over sleeping. Outside, I found my neighbor and a strange guy, he asked me to initiate an IV line to a dying patient who was discharge from the hospital 3 days ago. I blame my mom from telling stories about me about this incident. I hurried and prepare myself for the favor. I walked with my mom while I incessantly nag her about what happen.
We arrived in an unfinished house with no furniture except from an old bed where a dying patient lies. Her mom come over and told that if I didn't come she might have initiated the line. I asked her whether she is a nurse or something, she said no. Another person who thinks our job is that easy. The patient is suffering from renal failure and her family had spent almost all their resources just to get him well. Sadly, dialysis is the only procedure that will lengthen his life. The patient is too dehydrated that made it hard for me to initiate the line. It took me 3 attempts before I was able to get into his veins. I went home after I secured the line.
I felt weird after my mom had a confession after seeing the boy. She said she felt extremely sad and she pity the boy's physical condition that's why she hurriedly fled away. She couldn't stand to witness such scene. On the other hand, I felt nothing except from occasional hand tremors. Probably my mind was too preoccupied about the procedure I'm going to do that I had no time to feel sympathy for the boy. On my part, the boy doesn't need sympathy, he needs medical attention and that is what I'm giving him.
After that scene, I suddenly felt the urge to join an institution again and handle patients. I know it has been part of my system to help but I'm not certain whether what I'm doing is helping or proving something to myself.
